Senior Sidekicks
  • Home
    • Vacation & Stand-By Plans
    • About
    • Advocacy
    • FAQ
    • Contact
  • Consultations
    • Consultation Gift Certificate
  • Senior Care Course
    • Parenting Your Parent
  • Blogs & Articles
    • Do You Know Someone In This Situation? - Blog
    • A Senior Moment
    • "A Senior Moment." - Archive
    • Article Portfolio
  • Home
    • Vacation & Stand-By Plans
    • About
    • Advocacy
    • FAQ
    • Contact
  • Consultations
    • Consultation Gift Certificate
  • Senior Care Course
    • Parenting Your Parent
  • Blogs & Articles
    • Do You Know Someone In This Situation? - Blog
    • A Senior Moment
    • "A Senior Moment." - Archive
    • Article Portfolio

Why don’t we recognize and support caregivers?

8/8/2019

0 Comments

 
Picture
According to The Strange Political Silence On Elder Care, the problem is our society has an extraordinary number of caregivers who haven’t formed a  group to push for change. Unlike other groups, such as Mothers Against Drunk Driving (MADD), caregivers should have formed a constituency to insist on changes which better support them; but they haven’t.  Why not?  One surprising finding is that caregivers don’t recognize themselves!  How can our society offer support to a person who denies needing help?  How can we help if they believe they can’t ask?  What is the effect of this lack of coalescing, lack of self-identification and the resulting failure to prepare and plan?

This article describes the possible reasons:
  1. Caregivers help in private, not seen by the public.
  2. There’s no “bad guy” like big banks failing during the financial crisis.  The bad guys become a rallying cry to bring others to a cause.
  3. Many caregivers think they’re the only one; so there is no one to call.
  4.  Many caregivers believe it’s their duty and a “family matter”.
  5. Political support doesn’t divide along party lines; it divides between those who were caregivers –vs- those who never did caregiving.

Senior Sidekicks has stood with caregivers for the past 12 years! The caregiving phase is the newest part of life’s journey. A little over 100 years ago, people didn’t live long enough to reach this stage. Our firm has struggled to get new caregivers and those in the midst of caregiving to accept help. Perhaps this article explains why people, who are otherwise prudent, take such a strange view of caregiving.

Let’s compare and contrast caregiving attitudes with attitudes to other parts of life’s journey:

Your getting married, do you make plans? What kind of a wedding would you have if you didn’t acknowledge you were engaged? How would you bring your lives together in marriage: legal, financial, religious, integrating your families, where to live,  and children?

My parents, like many during WWII, had a hurry-up wedding. They were high school sweethearts, and engaged in college. When my father finished his course work and ROTC, he was shipped to Texas. The university mailed his diploma. My mother took the train to Texas and they were married by a preacher on base. They had 3 weeks of wedded bliss before he shipped out for 3 years!

Mother went home to a fire storm! Both sets of parents were in shock. Mother had not completed her college education; could she go back and finish? Would the all-girls school take her back as a married woman? Neither of my parents had completed paperwork naming her his spouse? Forms and letters took a long time to reach soldiers in the field and even longer to receive replies. Who would be the listed next-of-kin in the event he didn’t come home? She even had to discuss possible burial arrangements!! Who was now responsible to pay for her education? Was she to receive his pay since she was his spouse? Mother described it as a very trying time that she had to face alone because they didn’t plan.

Weddings are as much a family matter as caregiving. A wedding, without planning, causes major stress. Caregiving, without planning and support also causes major stress. Yet, families will tell me they’ll handle it all by themselves: really?

Let’s look at another example:

You’re having a baby! Does that mean you don’t need any help? If you’re expecting do you still need proper medical care, resolve legal matters, insurance, or a larger place to live? We expect that expectant parents need help. We’ve developed the social systems to provide it. Having children brings many resources into the family. There are Family Medical Leave Act (FMLA) for both parents in certain situations. There are prepared childbirth classes, visiting nurses to the home after delivery and new mother’s groups. Relatives come to help the new mother and baby. Everybody sends food!

It’s acceptable to have help for babies, why not for caregivers? The difference is we’ve had babies for millennia; caregivers, less than 100 years.
 
Thus, the family caregiver may or may not receive some defacto help from her church, neighbors, or friends. There’s no visiting nurse system. The caregiver can take FMLA but it’s complicated and doesn’t always cover the type of caregiving the employee needs to give the elder. Many FMLAs don’t pay the employee. Caregiving may mean moving the elder closer to the caregiver, or moving in with the elder. Caregiving may be so demanding that it afflicts the caregiver’s health. The caregiver may be forced to quit the job. A break in the caregiver’s career creates a major financial setback as the caregiver tries to re-enter the workforce. Caregivers often draw on their retirement savings during caregiving.

Other developed countries have seen this writing on the wall and started putting plans in place. Why can’t the US do that? We can, if we act now.

You can do two things:


  1. A WAKE-UP CALL to all persons who are not yet in the caregiving situation.  If you read these blogs, you are already attuned to caregiving.  Lend your voice to the call for caregiver support.

Talk to your neighbors. Ask what your church is doing for caregivers? Ask your employer the same thing. FMLA, by itself, is not an adequate response.) Are you a member of a union; put caregiver support on the bargaining table. We already have mandatory courses in sexual harassment and discrimination.  Make caregiving training the next mandatory course. Are you an employer? If you prepare for tornadoes; prepare for this gray tsunami. By 2030, 1 in 5 Americans will be over age 60

ENTER THE POLITICAL DEBATE ON THE SIDE OF CAREGIVERS: It’s time to insist that the political conversation of this campaign is about  p-r-e-p-a-r-i-n-g for this gray tsunami!  It touches everyone.  It’s not red or blue, it’s GRAY.  Candidates will ask for your vote; tell them to put caregiving in their platform to get your vote!

Caregiving is at least as important as any other policy

0 Comments

Attention all veterans!  Have you heard about the changes in Aid and Attendance Pension Benefits?

10/10/2018

0 Comments

 
Picture
October 18th, the V.A. is starting a 36 month “look back” on gifts. This will affect the eligibility for The Aid & Attendance Pension Benefit. It has been a lifeline to afford the Long Term Care they need. The V.A. is also changing the asset limit (the amount they family can hold and still qualify) to $123,000.  If the veteran still lives in the house; it’s not counted toward assets.  If they are planning to sell the house, the money from the sale could be counted.  However, with proper strategies, they might still be able to qualify.  Some veterans can no longer live in the same house (too many stairs, too far from care)   If a veteran is planning on selling the house, please contact the Veteran’s Financial immediately: 1-800-835-1541. 

Picture
Picture
Picture
2_-_senior_sidekicks_-_sara_lieber_-_va_aid___attndnc_bnfts2018.jpg
File Size: 641 kb
File Type: jpg
Download File

1_-_senior_sidekicks_-_sara_lieber__-_va_ad___attndnc_brchr.2018.jpg
File Size: 643 kb
File Type: jpg
Download File

3_-_senior_sidekicks_-_sara_lieber_-_va.ad__attndnc.brchr.pg_2.2018.jpg
File Size: 679 kb
File Type: jpg
Download File

0 Comments

    Author

     "A Senior Moment" is written by Ms. Sara Lieber, owner of Senior Sidekicks. Ms. Lieber has over 30 years of experience in senior care.


    Archives

    April 2022
    March 2022
    November 2021
    June 2020
    May 2020
    April 2020
    March 2020
    December 2019
    August 2019
    July 2019
    December 2018
    November 2018
    October 2018
    September 2018
    August 2018
    July 2018
    June 2018
    December 2017
    September 2017
    August 2017
    July 2017
    June 2017
    May 2017

    RSS Feed

    Categories

    All
    1918 Spanish Flu
    AARP
    Adult Children
    Age
    Aging Population
    Alocohol
    Alzheimer's Association
    Alzheimr's
    American Society On Aging
    Art
    Bbc
    Bbc Worklife
    Blog
    Bosses
    Campaign
    Care
    Caregivers
    Caregivers Guilt
    Caregiver Shortage
    Caregiving
    Cargiving
    Catastrophic
    CDC
    CDC Guidelines
    Changes
    Children
    Christmas
    Churches
    Classes
    Community
    Consultation
    Consulting
    Coroanavirus
    Coronavirus
    Corona Virus 19
    Corona Virus-19
    Cortisol
    Counselors
    Course
    Covid
    Crazy
    Dementia
    Depressoin
    Designer Drugs
    Downsizing
    Drugs
    Drug Testing
    Elder Boom
    Elderly
    Employer
    Employers
    Employment
    Face Masks
    Faith
    Families
    Family Medical Leave Act
    Fight Or Flight Response
    FLMA
    Flu
    God
    Greeting Cards
    Grief
    Guilt
    Hanukka
    Health Complaints
    Hearing Aids
    Holidays
    Home
    Home Care
    House
    Hr
    Human Rescources
    Illinois
    Immune System
    Isolation
    Legacy
    Mail
    Maine
    Mandate
    Medicaid
    Medical Visit Companion
    Memory
    Memory Loss
    Million
    News
    Next Avenue
    Nursing Home
    Opioid Epidemic
    Opioids
    Organizations
    Paid Time Off
    Pandemic
    Parents
    Pastoral Counselors
    Performance
    Photos
    Planning
    Plans
    Polio
    Post Office
    Preparing To Parent Your Parent Course
    Presidential Campaign 2020
    Psychiatric Disorder
    PTO
    Public Education Program
    Quarantine
    Real Estate
    Realtors
    Realty
    Religious
    Retirement
    Sara Lieber
    Self Care
    Self-care
    Senior Depression
    Senior Population
    Seniors
    Senior Sidekicks
    Sheltering In Place
    Shelter In Place
    Shortage
    SHRM
    Sisters
    Social Distancing
    Social Isolation Task Force
    Solcial Isolation
    Special Occassion Service
    Special Occassion Services
    Springfield
    Stamps
    State Agencies
    Stay-At-Home Orders
    Stress
    Stress Hormone
    Stressors
    Study
    Sugar
    Sundowner
    Symptom
    Symptom Picture
    Symptoms
    Synagogues
    Thanksgiving
    The Aid & Attendance Pension Benefit
    The Older Americans Act
    Two
    United States
    United States Wages
    Unpaid Family Care
    US Mail
    U.S. Wages
    VA
    Vaccines
    Valentine's Day
    Veterans
    Veterans Financial
    Virus
    Visiting Olivia
    Visits
    Worker Shortage
    Worklife
    Young People

Proudly powered by Weebly